Someone who can eat one piece of chocolate….
Several months ago I wrote an article for Restoration on gossip, which was well-received. The topic emerged from a talk I was asked to give to Our Lady Seat of Wisdom College nearby.
Teresa Reilander suggested to me last summer that perhaps I could write about moderation. As I said to Teresa at the time, “I can’t write about moderation. I’m not moderate!” But recently I volunteered to give a 20-minute class to our guests at Madonna House and found myself preparing to speak on just that topic.
In the meantime, alas, I have still not become moderate. There are potato chip flakes on my sweater as I type this. But at least I am familiar with the struggle.
What is moderation?
When you search for “moderation” in the index of the Catechism*, you land on many passages where we are advised to be moderate in our use of various different created goods. But there is no one section that specifically describes “moderation” as such.
“Moderation” is, however, given as a synonym for “temperance”, one of the four cardinal virtues. There is a developed account of “temperance” in paragraph 1809 of the Catechism:
Temperance is the moral virtue that moderates the attraction of pleasures and provides balance in the use of created goods. It ensures the will’s mastery over instincts and keeps desires within the limits of what is honorable. … In the New Testament it is called “moderation” or “sobriety.”
For the most part, I can write about these two virtues interchangeably. Where there are discrepancies, I will make note of them.
How does a moderate person behave?
Someone who is moderate engages with the things of this world in a way that is balanced and appropriate. They are not extreme in their indulgence in food or drink, they can exercise restraint over their speech and opinions, they work and live at a pace that is neither frenetic nor sluggish.
Moderate people don’t seek sensory pleasure; they don’t engage in acts solely for the pleasure to be obtained thereby. For example, if they are already full, they don’t eat unless charity requires it for some reason. Of course, on a physical level, they will still experience pleasure when, for example, they eat something delicious, and they will be attracted to delicious foods.
But their lives are not governed by these pleasures and desires. They can hold their own desires and preferences at arm’s length and make a choice about whether and when to follow them. A temperate person eats primarily in order to sustain the life of the body, i.e. his reasons for eating are in accordance with the purpose of eating.
This does not apply just to food, however. All kinds of impulses and drives are regulated with a view to their ultimate purpose. Sex is an obvious situation where that type of self-control is crucially important.
Sleep is another drive that is, of course, as biologically important to the temperate person as it is to everyone.
However, another higher good might be more important than sleep on certain occasions, and the temperate person, out of charity, will sometimes need to make a choice to abbreviate their sleep within the limits of their own physical abilities, e.g., waking up to check on a crying baby, picking up someone from the airport, getting up early to pray.
Being moderate or temperate also applies to being restrained in my speech. I am moderate in my speech if I can wait my turn to speak during a table conversation, if I can hold back on biting comments out of charity for those around me, if I can stop teasing when I get the sense that this is hurting someone, etc.
On the other hand, moderation in my speech also means I do participate in conversation at the table, rather than remaining silent. I am neither too quiet nor too much the center of attention.
When I think about moderation and my lack of it, I think, “A moderate person is someone who can eat one piece of chocolate.” I find that I can eat none, or I can eat ten, but eating just one is enormously difficult.
My clearest example of this comes from time I spent with a community before I came to Madonna House. We ate our meals in silence, but a few times a week we had a half hour of “recreation” after the meal, all of us sitting around a table, asking questions of whatever visitor was with us that day.
While we were taking an interest in the life of our visitor, a little plate of chocolates would get passed around. It was a great exercise in self-restraint to pay attention to our guest and not get distracted by the question: “Is that plate of chocolates going to come past again?”
◈◈◈
Is moderation a gift of God that we pray for or a habit we have to acquire by our own effort?
We need to both pray for help and to exert ourselves. Temperance is a moral virtue, which means it is “acquired by human effort” (Catechism 1804).
Moderation begins right now, when I choose to eat one chocolate, and then say, “That’s enough for today.” Maybe I choose to take only one helping of something I really like at lunch and take a second helping of something that appeals to me less. Then, also at lunch, I read the tone of the conversation and try to contribute without becoming the center of attention.
I wake up at 6 a.m. to pray before my day starts, but not at 4, which would leave me exhausted and inefficient in my work. If, through repeated choices like these, I am able to behave this way habitually, then I have acquired the virtue of temperance.
Since this virtue develops through our own practice and effort, is it possible to be temperate without depending on God’s intervention?
Indeed, quite apart from a conscious belief that God can work in the soul, some ancient Greek and Roman philosophers may have developed a high degree of temperance. Through practice they acquired the habit of submitting all their lower desires and impulses to reason.
However, most of us learn our need for God precisely by failing in our attempts to gain mastery over our desires and preferences. It is here that we are most acutely aware of our need for God’s help.
Even St. Paul says, I delight in the law of God in my inmost self, but I see in my members another law at war with the law of my mind, making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched person that I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! (Rm 7:22)
We need grace passing through the sacramental life of the Church (especially the sacrament of reconciliation) to allow us to press the “reset” button, to get up with a clean slate and try again.
Another difference between the temperance developed by the Christian and the temperance of the philosophers is that the Holy Spirit, given to us at baptism, elevates what we might be able to achieve through our own efforts, directing it to a higher end which is the glory of God.
The presence of the Holy Spirit at our baptism infuses us with the potential for self-control, one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit, even if, by nature, we might be the sort of person who had little such capacity.
So, practically speaking, we need to both pray for God’s help in becoming moderate in our appetites and we need to make an effort, deliberately making small choices that will help us develop the habit of moderation.
To be continued…
* Catechism of the Catholic Church, Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 1997.
Image: “Moderation” sketch by ©Alexander MacAdam, Madonna House.
